Our guide for the friends and families of the bereaved shows you how to help without getting in the way.
"An exemplary work on a difficult subject" - renowned author Nigella Lawson
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It is awful when someone you love goes through the unbearable pain of bereavement. You feel distraught and completely unable to help. You can't take away the grief, but there are many things you can do to make everyday life more bearable. And no-one knows better what those things might be than people who have been bereaved themselves.
This guide explains how it feels, and also passes on the advice of many other people who have been bereaved. These people know exactly what helped them most (and what was well-meant but not helpful) at the time, and in the months, weeks and years afterwards.
This ebook is full of little ways - and big ways - you can help someone you care about cope that little bit better. |
If There's Anything I Can Do...
Practical ways to help someone who has been bereaved.
When you are traveling the long, lonely road of grief, there are times when people simply don't know what to say or do and when even the closest of friendships are straining at the seams; when you walk back into work and a silence falls across the office as people look down at their desks, unaware of how to treat you; when mothers from your childrens' nursery dodge into another aisle in the supermarket to avoid having to face you; when you realize that friends have stopped calling or visiting because listening to your unending pain is just becoming too much.
The grief of a friend can be a terrible thing to witness. There is nothing you can do to stem the tide, and yet, you really do want to help. And you can help. You can ease the pain. You can never bring back the person who has died, which is all your friend really wants. But there are dozens of things you can do to lighten the load he or she has to carry. And you can keep on doing it, without getting in the way, not just for a few weeks but for months and even years if you wish.
This brave, compassionate ebook is an invaluable resource for the friends and family of the bereaved. Let us show you what to do and say to really make a difference...
"An invaluable resource for both the bereaved and their friends and family, this compassionate, brave piece of work covers everything from the practical issues (flowers, letters, what to say) to the intangibles (moral support, mental health)
to taking those first steps to moving on." Daily Record
"If There's Anything I Can Do is an outstanding resource that identifies exactly
what the bereaved need from family and friends. It is specific, practical and enlightening. It rings true to the reader because the author is herself a widow
with young children who is finding her own way through grief, and her experiences
and recommendations are enhanced by the poignant comments of other bereaved partners and single parents who are struggling too." Marty Tousley, hospice bereavement counselor, www.griefhealing.com
"I wanted to let you know how grateful I am to you for publishing this amazing book.
A close friend and neighbor died suddenly this summer leaving a heavily pregnant
widow and two small children. The insights of the author and her contributors into bereavement and the advice about what to do and how to help have been so helpful.
It has given me the confidence to just do things and offer assistance that otherwise
I would have worried about offering." Customer comment
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You really CAN make a difference...
If There's Anything I Can Do: helping you to help others
- Suitable for English speakers all over the world; the principles in this book apply whether you are in the US, Canada, the UK, Australia, South Africa...
- Packed with reassuring suggestions for how to help out, put together by the author, whose partner died leaving her with two young children, and many other contributors who have lived through one of life's biggest challenges
- An immensely practical, helpful resource which shows you exactly how to help a bereaved friend or relative without getting in the way
- A much-needed book of advice on what not to do or say around bereaved friends and relations, as well as all the right things to do and say
- Gives you the confidence to just do things and offer assistance without worrying
"Both touching and practical." YOU magazine, Mail on Sunday
"Just wanted to let you know that I ordered a copy of If There's Anything I Can Do…
and I think it is wonderful. My husband died in 2004 and I wish I had had it then. I
want to lend it to the whole world and am wondering whether I should buy a second
copy in case I don't get it back. Great to read something without reference to the supernatural - except a plea not to invoke it." Customer comment
"Reassuring suggestions for helping out without getting in the way, from a writer whose partner died, leaving her with two young children." Caroline Sanderson
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What kind of suggestions will you find in this book?
This ebook has been written from the perspective of someone whose partner, husband or wife has died, which is the author's own experience. If There's Anything I Can Do also has many viewpoints and contributions from other people who have suffered the loss of a loved one, saying what helped them most (and what was probably well-meant but not helpful) at the time and in the months, weeks and years afterwards. Yet it is not just for someone who has lost a partner; in many cases the principles are also appropriate to someone grieving the loss of a child, sibling, close friend or parent.
It is an enormously practical reference book, packed full of suggestions which you can implement immediately, showing you the best ways to do things like:
- writing a condolence letter when someone loses a loved one
- how to offer to help without causing offence
- how to really listen to your bereaved friend
- cooking and shopping for the bereaved
- helping with children and teenagers
- helping with the mountain of paperwork that bereavement brings
- how to make holidays and short breaks fun again
- doing odd jobs around the house and garden
- being there for the long haul
- buying the right gift
Don't worry, it doesn't need to feel like an onerous task – many of the ideas in this book are simple, easy things that are part and parcel of friendship, but can still make a big difference to someone who is grieving.
Practical, logical, inspiring ways to help...
How is the book delivered? How soon will you get it?
- The ebook is an easy-to-use PDF file. No physical products will be shipped. After you place your order, you will get INSTANT ACCESS to a page where you can download the ebook onto your computer
- You will need the free Adobe Reader software which most people already have on their computer (if you haven't got it, don't worry - we tell you how to install it)
- No waiting for the mailman to deliver, and no trips to the bookstore either, as this is a digital product which you can read on your computer or print out, as you wish
- In 5 minutes from now, you could be browsing through the ebook on your computer screen - no matter whether it's 2 pm or 2 am! Just click on one of the Buy Now buttons and complete the simple order form
- The simple layout makes it quick and easy to read the ebook
- The book is suitable for both Mac and PC users
"Watching a friend grieve for someone they love is heartbreaking. This book
makes it easier and shows you ways you can really help." Darren Clarke
"The author explains that navigating the rocky road to recovery is difficult
enough, overwhelming without assistance, and her forthright guide helps
everyone to give the sort of help that makes such a pivotal difference in
these circumstances." The Good Book Guide
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What else will you find in If There's Anything I Can Do...?
Created with ease and speed of navigation in mind.
- It's easy to navigate the table of contents: just click on the title and go straight to the section you require
- Clear layout, with lots of bullet points and bold print to help you read quickly
- 105 pages long, with clear instructions on how to print individual pages
- Easy to either print out or read on your computer screen
"A genuinely useful guide for bewildered friends who want to help but have
no idea where to start." The Lady
"I wish I had read this two years ago as I have been supporting my bereaved
friend and I think this is all fantastic advice." … "It's a really great piece, no
nonsense, logical, practical help." … "It is wonderful. I've saved it to perhaps
give to friends and family." Customer comments
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NEW: order TODAY to receive our unique, practical Bereavement For Beginners guide. ABSOLUTELY 100% FREE - value $9.95
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Our 'Bereavement For Beginners' ebook is a practical, useful guide for the bereaved and those who care about them. With 40 pages simply packed full of information, inspiration and words of comfort, it is our free gift to you (value $9.95).
Order your copy of 'Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep' today and you will automatically receive 'Bereavement For Beginners' FREE. You could be reading it 5 minutes from now.
"Bereavement For Beginners is the book you pray you will never need, and then are only too glad to discover is available when you need it. I wish this comforting resource had been around 16 years ago and two years ago in my own personal hours of need. The contents are useful and uplifting and ease the way to a therapeutic grief process. I look forward to being able to share it with others, and I feel better just knowing it's there." Judith Morgan |
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About the Author
Lucie Storrs
 I'm Lucie Storrs, creator of the Light Beyond site. This project grew out of my own experiences of grief and loss, my desire to help others and love of the Internet as a means for doing so.
It has never been simpler to reach out and make a difference in the world. I hope that in some small way we help to make your journey through grief a little easier.
That thought has kept me going over the past six months! Please do get in touch with any feedback or comments you may have.
My thanks are due to...
Lots of people have helped me make this dream a reality. I am so grateful for Peter Harrison, my wonderful family and large collection of four-legged friends for their love, as well as Judith Morgan and Marion Ryan for their support and encouragement, Karen Knowler for sheer inspiration, Phil Gosling for showing me how it's done and Nicola Cairncross for introducing me to the wonders of the web in the first place. In many ways, we live in wonderful times, although it may not always seem like it. I think it's very important to remember that. |
Meet my mother...
This project is dedicated to my mother Lyn Storrs (Evelyn Avery Jones), 1941-1969. How I wish I could remember her even a little. I do hope she's proud of me.
My mother died so long ago now, it seems, that most people will have forgotten her. I wonder what she would have thought of modern times and this new-fangled thing called the Internet?
Anyway, I wanted to remind the world that she existed and that she mattered to lots of people. I even thought that in some way she might enjoy a little outing in the 21st century. Who knows?
Writers
Many thanks to our transatlantic team of talented writers, who are sadly all too well acquainted with grief: Nancy Adams, Margaret Kohut, Paulette Perhach, Heather Grenier, Rhonda Oneslager and, last but not least, Mary Ella Holway. I admire you all very much for your courage and for sharing your experiences so generously to help others. |
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